The Index -|-

A breath of wind touched Thoka’s head, and the roots of her hair tugged gently at the skin of her scalp. She smiled and enjoyed the moment with her eyes closed. It had been so long since she had experienced a breeze that she had nearly forgotten what it felt like. A momentary chill brushed over her arms, and she shivered slightly before pressing against Kpleeb’s warm body. She felt him squirm for a few seconds before jerking suddenly.

She opened her eyes.

A ray of light flickered as particles floated down from above. Fog expanded as she exhaled.

She blinked to clarify the scene.

“What is going on?” she heard Kpleeb mutter.

The skin on Thoka’s back chilled instantly when he sat up, and she shivered again more intensely.

“Thoka, wake up!” Kpleeb’s large and hairy palm grabbed her arm and shook her.

“I am awake,” she said brusquely. Her eyes blinked again. Almost everything was white through the haze, and it was very cold. Thoka sat up and looked around. There were tree branches over her head, evergreen she realized, and they were heavy with snow. The branches shimmied slightly in the wind, and another shower of fine flakes scattered and settled gently on her and Kpleeb.

“What in the pit of the damned is going on?” Kpleeb stood awkwardly and in doing so his shook the branches. More frozen flakes of ice fell on Thoka. He remained hunched over under the low branches as he looked about.

“I’m cold. Can you stop shaking the tree?”

“Yes, maybe. This dream feels too strange. Let me look around.” Kpleeb ducked through a gap in the foliage and disappeared with the branches shaking in his wake.

Thoka huddled with her arms around her legs for warmth. Her belly jolted as she compressed it. “We’ll be alright, little one,” she said quietly. This dream was indeed the most realistic that she had ever encountered, but almost nothing could surprise her after experiencing the substantial and abnormal dreams of the past few months.

“Is this one of your dreams, child?” she murmured quietly. There was no response.

She breathed in deeply and savored the cold air. It had been so long since she had experienced the autumn chill back home on the wet mountains. [It is so cold. Maybe I am just soft from being cooped up inside the caves for so long. Or maybe this dream is more frigid than reality.] She rubbed her forearms with her palms and blew a fine fog out into the space around the tree.

The trunk was grey-brown and a pale. Green lichen clung to its surface in spots. The bark was craggly with sections made of layers of woody material separated by deep and natural gouges. Thoka put her finger into one of the gouges and pried a thin layer away. The wood underneath was lighter and browner. Branches sprouted from the trunk just above her head. It was an evergreen, much like the trees that covered parts of the wet mountains back home. The needles were a brighter hue and longer than her hand.

Thoka reached out and plucked a needle from the branch in front of her and smelled it. [This dream is incredibly lifelike and beautiful!] She put one end of the needle in her mouth and tasted an astringent and bitter flavor that instantly brought back memories of her childhood and the needle-tea that the village healer would make her drink when she was sick.

Just then, the branches to her left parted slightly and Kpleeb’s hand penetrated the space and waved wildly in circles. “You must come outside, Thoka,” he whispered loudly. His hand continued to gesture blindly at her.

Thoka shifted to her knees and took his hand. He tugged and she emerged from under the tree’s boughs into a dense forest.

The trees were mostly the same, though their size and shapes varied. The sky was hazy and overcast, and Thoka saw a few small birds flutter across between the tree tops. Snow blanketed everything in every direction and completely covered the ground except where the occasional large stone protruded above the drifts. Deep footprints led from where Kpleeb stood holding her hand to the left and out of sight.

Thoka’s feet were terribly cold and goosebumps raised on every inch of her skin. She stamped her feet and looked at the disbelieving expression on Kpleeb’s face.

“Come this way,” he said. “I know it’s cold, but you have to see this.” He pulled at her hand, and she followed. He bounded slowly at first, and then more quickly until Thoka had difficulty keeping up.

“Slow down, Kpleeb.”

“I know but…”

Thoka tripped and landed face first in a snow drift.

Kpleeb came to a halt when her hand left his, and he immediately helped her stand. “Sorry,” he said.

The look of chagrin on his face was enough to prevent her from berating him. She nodded at him and then adjusted her top and brushed the snow off of her skin before allowing him to lead her forward.

They followed the footsteps he had made in the snow until there was a break in the trees. The vista opened up as the stepped onto a rock formation at the edge of a canyon. From their perch Thoka could see that the canyon stretched in both directions for as far as she could see. It was long and winding, and in the far distance to their right was an icy mountain peak. She walked forward carefully and looked downward into the canyon. As she approached the drop-off, she could hear the faint sound of water rushing over rocks.

“I can’t see how deep it is,” said Kpleeb. He still held her hand. “The tops of trees are very far down, but there must be some way to get to the water.” He looked in each direction before shrugging.

Thoka nodded and her suspicions solidified to mesh with the facts. “This is not a dream.”

“If it is, it’s like no dream I ever had. It is too cold.” He pulled her back from the edge and wrapped his arms around her from behind. “You are freezing. We have to find shelter.”

Thoka nodded.

Kpleeb turned back toward the trees and dug into the snow under the largest tree he could see. When he was done, he led Thoka into the tunnel he had created. “This isn’t much, but it will keep the wind out.” He arranged some of the dried needles and brush into a nest before patting her on the shoulder. “I will get more branches to cover any gaps, and for a fire.”

Thoka sat down under the branches shivering almost uncontrollably so that her bracelets clattered together. “Hurry up, Kpleeb. I need your body warmth very soon.”

He nodded and rushed back through the small tunnel. A few, long moments later he returned with an armload of dried brush. He dropped the brush next to Thoka and bent back into the tunnel to pull a large branch into the opening.

“I haven’t made a fire in so long,” he said conversationally. “I hope I can get it done quickly. Spread your legs straight out,” he said.

Thoka complied.

He sat in front of her, between her legs. “Now take the heat from my back while I work on this fire.”

Thoka shivered and quietly wrapped her arms around Kpleeb’s hairy torso from behind. It was cold, but heat emanated from him, and she was grateful for him. [Who knew a hairy man-body could have a legitimate function.] She smiled to herself and rested her cheek on his back.

Kpleeb muttered to himself, and his shoulder muscles writhed as he worked with his sticks and branches. After a few minutes he sighed loudly and stopped moving.

“Crack it!” he cursed. “We always banked the coals back home in the canyon. Nobody had to make a real fire. The last time I made one from scratch was during my cavemanhood training.” He shrugged. “My da gave me all the tools and it took me an hour to make a fire. Here, I don’t have all the tools.”

“Keep trying. We must survive.” Thoka patted his chest and hugged him closely. “I believe in you.” She was no longer shivering.

He did continue to work at it, and eventually after much cursing and grumbling, Thoka felt a new heat on the backs of her hands. She turned her palms away from Kpleeb’s warm chest and enjoyed the sensation. “Thank you.”

He nodded and silently continued feeding the fire for a few moments. “I think it will stay lit now,” he said. “I need to get more brush. Can you keep it going?” He stood carefully, and ducked into the tunnel without waiting for an answer.

Thoka slowly placed small twigs onto the tiny fire one at a time. She had tended and built fires on many occasions growing up and knew that extreme cold could sap the heat from a fire and make it go out. After a moment, the fire did sputter and die. She cursed quietly to herself. [I have to get this going again before Kpleeb comes back.]

There were small coals, and a few moments of blowing and care brought the vanishing flame back to life. By the time Kpleeb came back, the fire was a above her knee. Thoka looked up as he came in. “I’m glad you have plenty more. We’ll run out of wood pretty quickly.”

Kpleeb coughed lightly and dropped his arm-load of brush next to the fire. “Wow, it’s smoky in here.”

“This is another thing we did not have to endure in the caves. Were your caves back home smoky?”

Kpleeb nodded. “They were, but most of them had the smoke river to draw it away.”

“What’s a smoke river?”

“Well, the leader before Fab Elder Shoofit had some of the cavemen carve channels into the cave ceilings leading from the fire pits to the outside. The smoke always ran away from the fire in those channels. I never thought about it until now, but I guess the hot smoke rose to the highest point, the channel, and moved continually upward until they reached some other space. The caves further away from the main chambers were always smoky though. Maybe the smoke had cooled by then and began to sink and spread.”

Thoka nodded. “That makes sense. We lived in tips and caves. The caves had bore-holes and lead to the surface and the tips had simple holes in the top.”

“And the tips are those round, pole-shelters covered with hide? How did they drill the hole from the cave ceiling to the surface?”

“Yeah, that’s a tip. They worked very well for outside living. I don’t know who thought of the roof holes, but the healer told me once that the first holes were old water channels.” Thoka chuckled. “She told me that sometimes in a storm, the channel would dump enough water into the fire to douse it. They eventually dug some other pit that allowed the smoke to rise but diverted the water elsewhere.”

“Ahh, smart,” Kpleeb said. “Your tribe was very advanced.”

“Well, I don’t know,” she said shrugging noncommittally, “I mean… look at us now. We are so much smarter than before.”

Kpleeb looked thoughtful. “True.” He sighed and held his hands out to the fire that was now crackling happily. “Without the food outcropping, I will have to hunt, and I was never the best hunter.”

“Mmm. Yes. Do you know snares?”

Kpleeb shook his head. “We used spears and clubs. We used spears and nets for fishing. Maybe there are fish in the river down there,” he said in a hopeful tone. He sat down next to Thoka and put his arm over her shoulders.

“We will be okay. I’ll teach you about snares.” I need several long, green branches to start off with.” Thoka smiled at Kpleeb. “I’m not freezing any longer, but I can also teach you how to make caves out of snow.”

“That’s strange,” he said thoughtfully.

“Yes, but it works.” Thoka reached out and affectionately scratched his scraggly beard with her fingernails. “Let’s get to work.”

The Index -|-

“Wind is breath of great spirit tahr. Sun is eye. Life under sun is life in harmony with great spirit tahr and all cavemankind.”

-Fab Elder Shoofit (Unknown date)

“There was a time when I felt that the world was so small. It consisted solely of the canyon river, the caves, and the patch of tundra that was visible from the ridge. Now, it seems so large. These two caves have been the entirety of our universe for many months. The wall fills with endless day-marks, and I feel at times as if these caves are closing in on me.”

Kpleeb paused and looked at the wall. It really was filling up. Thoka had made small marks, but despite that, the space filled was at least as wide and tall as he was. She had come up with a larger grouping of the counts that made the appearance of squares around the groups.

[She really is so very smart.] He looked around the room and grimaced. [How can I tell her that this life is driving me crazy?] He sighed despondently and muttered, “these gods can go to the pit of the damned.”

“Hey, Kpleeb, what was that?” Thoka was walking toward him.

“Urh- just complaining about the gods.” He shrugged noncommittally.

She eyed him warily. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Well, I just…” Kpleeb paused and struggled internally for a moment. [This is your chance to talk. Take it.] 

“I am getting tired of these caves, to put it plainly. It’s driving me crazy.” He turned and pointed at the gap between the caves. “I enjoy working with the stone and discovering new things. I like learning, but it’s not enough.”

“I know –“

“Wait, let me finish. Sorry. I need to say this.”

Frustration momentarily flashed across Thoka’s face before she appeared to regain control.

Kpleeb continued. “There are things to do and… it is very nice being with you. We have everything we need, in fact. But it’s just not enough. I miss the outside! I want to feel the sun and the wind. I just feel trapped.”

Thoka wrapped her arms around Kpleeb and rested her head on his hairy shoulder. “I understand. I feel that way too, but I try hard to focus on learning things.”

“Me too! I am trying. It’s just so small in here!” Kpleeb shrugged. “I am learning plenty as I rebuild the device I broke. It’s good and interesting work…” He sighed. “I need to run around.”

Thoka nodded somberly. “I understand. How do you think we can fix this?”

“You mean, get out or run around inside?” Kpleeb looked at the length of the cave and imagined it twice as long. “Even with both caves, it is not very much. Plus, the grey stone has never moved for us, and the gap isn’t wide enough to move through it quickly.”

“How do we get out of these caves, Kpleeb?”

He pondered for a long moment before shrugging. “We have tried brute force and the gods stopped us. We have tried speaking and they do not respond. What else can we do?”

“They must hear us even if they do not respond. Right?” Thoka gestured around her. “This cave responds to requests, but it does so without a voice. We know the cave understands, so we have to assume that the gods understand as well.”

Kpleeb nodded and smiled. He knew that Thoka only called them ‘gods’ occasionally for his benefit. Her own term was different. “The entities do understand us. What can we do with that? Should we try to convince them to let us go?” He chuckled deeply at the thought, but his laugh trailed off into an awkward cough when he saw that Thoka appeared pensive.

“Maybe. What if we worked on clear and logical reasons to let us go? What if we stuck to the points and made our case without emotions?”

Kpleeb paced to the food outcropping and back slowly as he mulled the words over in his head.

[My words have grown since the gods have changed me. Maybe these words can convince them.]

He turned and saw Thoka watching his face. “We have become smarter and our language skills have improved. Maybe it will work.”

“Yes, our intelligence has grown immensely and as a result, our vocabulary has expanded. We can be eloquent if we choose.”

“Hey, that’s what I just said,” Kpleeb said.

“Yes, in a way, Kpleeb.” Thoka patted him on the shoulder.

Kpleeb felt a little foolish. [She is still so much smarter than me.]

Thoka took Kpleeb’s hand and they sat down and began to outline their case against the gods. When it was time, they ate and drank while continuing their conversation. When the sun dimmed, they slept. The morning came, and Thoka rose first as was common. She worked quietly on her rods until Kpleeb awoke.

Kpleeb relieved himself in the far defecation pit and then trudged back to where Thoka was working. He scratched himself and yawned before taking a long pull of water from the food outcropping. Then with water dripping from his scraggly beard, he spoke.

“Are you ready?”

Thoka raised her eyes and stared at him with a long and earnest gaze. Finally, she answered. “I feel that I could prepare more.”

Kpleeb nodded impatiently. “That’s fine.”

“Look, Kpleeb. If this speech is our key to escaping this prison, don’t you want it to be perfect?”

He was crestfallen as he realized just how correct her statement was. “Yes. I understand. I… just don’t know what else to say or do. I don’t know how to make a better argument. I’m impatient too.”

“I know. I know. Just give me a little more time to prepare.”

He nodded and walked into the second cave to work.

Sometime later, Kpleeb had lost track, he heard the faint scuffle of Thoka’s feet on the stone. He turned to watch her approach.

“I think I’m ready. Why not now?” she said.

[She looks nervous.] He smiled in an attempt to put her at ease. “Do you want me to speak?”

Thoka shook her head. “No, I’ll do it like we agreed.”

“You are more well-spoken than I am,” said Kpleeb. He was relieved in a way because he understood the burden that rested on her tongue.

Thoka nodded in agreement and turned and looked in every direction.

“Good afternoon, entities,” she said in a normal voice. “You have not told us what to call you, so this is the term I will use for your kind.” She continued to turn occasionally and even paced back and forth a little as she spoke.

“You have captured us here in this artificial place where you simulate the night and the day with your technology. You have spoken to us and even touched us. We have never seen your form, but we know that you are not divine. Gods do not require prisons, nor do they need to disintegrate our tools when we threaten to crack the walls.” She raised her palms as if the entities must accept the facts she spoke of.

“We have not harmed you though we might be able to in the correct circumstances. Hence, the prison. The truth is that we come from peaceful peoples. You must know this of us. The wet mountain tribe was known for its diplomacy and restraint, and though I was never near the canyon river, I have never heard of a warring tribe from the region.”

Kpleeb nodded in what he hoped was a wise and thoughtful manner.

“We freely acknowledge that we are trapped beyond hope in this place. We know that your experiments with us may never be complete. In fact, you may have other caves adjacent to our own with other cavepeople.” She pointed in two directions. “You might even be evil, and in your wicked prerogative, you may be entertained by reaching out and breaking the lives and souls of the cavepeople.” Thoka shrugged. “If this is true, we are lost. If this is not true then may our request fall on sympathetic ears.”

“Despite your actions being against our will, we give you our genuine gratitude for the metamorphosis that has been bestowed upon us.” She gestured at Kpleeb. “I thank you for this caveman. I have come to love him. I thank you for this child. Though she is our progeny, I understand that without your intervention none of this might have occurred.”

Kpleeb stood. [She is really good at this!]

“Lastly, entities, we make our request. Please release us. We cannot continue to live and grow here indefinitely. It is unnatural.” She placed her hands on her belly. “A childhood lived entirely in two small caves would be a travesty. Having our child grow here will stunt its intellect and remove from it the endless joy and education that we know comes from experiencing nature.” Thoka nodded and fell silent.

“We would be grateful if you release us to live the lives that we, and our child, deserve to live.” Kpleeb stood beside Thoka and stretched his arm across her back an put his palm on her hip.

She moved close and they waited together.

There was no sound at all. The cave was incredibly silent, and Kpleeb felt himself holding his breath. The moments stretched into many, and they grew uncomfortable from standing still. They shifted their stances and looked at each other. They had made a pact to wait as long as they could bear to wait before giving up. Thoka had said that it would be respectful and show strength to expect an honest answer.

Eventually, the sun dimmed, and they walked into the second cave to eat. Their meal was silent, and when it was done, they curled together in the sleeping hollow.

The darkness came inexorable and at a snail’s pace.

It took quite some time for Kpleeb to conquer his churning thoughts and fall asleep, but he finally nodded off.

[If we ever get out of here, I will make the gods pay.]

The Index -|-

The air shimmered on the ridge above her as Thoka climbed. Each step brought a steeper incline and after a few moments she began to use her hands to gain traction. The ground was covered with a grey moss that clung stubbornly to the dirt, but soon she snatched away a clump. Breathing deeply, she paused and watched the clump roll down the hill until it disappeared into the fog. The fog rested uneasily just a few paces below her and obscured the depth of the valley.

Thoka felt that she had been here in the past. Perhaps it was when her ma had taken her up to the peak when she was a teen. The ground seemed the same to her, but the scent was different. Where the moss had ripped away, the dirt was slick and littered with small, red-tinted stones. Foot slip. Her knee hit the ground and rolled to the right. A rock there bit into her skin and she yelped involuntarily.

She rolled further and tumbled. Her body bounced into the fog, and the breath was smashed out of her lungs by the following impact. Her vision blinked and darkness took over from the edges of her eyesight. There was another blow, and the lights went out momentarily. There was a faint sting in her belly as she landed, and she instinctively wrapped her mid-section with her arms.

Thoka opened her eyes. The sun was brighter than usual for it to be her regular time to wake. Her right eye was clouded with mucus, and she blinked to wash it away.

What a strange dream.

Kpleeb’s chest rose and fell just barely, and she could tell that he was still asleep. Thoka rested for a few moments and enjoyed the warmth emanating from his body before rolling over. She never slept in, even when it seemed like the best option. Even back home, in the wet mountains on snowy mornings she would rise when she awoke. Frosty and blizzard-y weather was exhilarating and made her skin tingle.

Of course here, in the cave, she did not need to bundle in her yakskin robe on a cold morning as she had in the wet mountains. She still felt chilly waking up but understood that this was merely the difference in temperature and that she would be used to it in moments. The cave was artificial and different enough in small ways, that she had almost always had a gut feeling that there were hidden secrets and stealthy hands that operated at an unseen and unknowable level. This train of thought unnerved her still, but she had made up her mind long ago to be strong and to escape.

While Thoka relieved herself, she thoughtfully rubbed her growing belly. Her mind was focused on the new day as well as the potential discoveries she might make, but she converged instantly into a heightened sense of concern when she felt the bump.

She bent down and looked closed. The red bump was the size of her fingertip and was located just below and to the right of her belly button.

“What?!” she shrieked at the top of her lungs. Anger and fear pummeled her in equal measures, and she rose. As she approached the gap between the caves, she saw Kpleeb standing.

His face wore a bewildered expression, and his shaggy mane was rumpled from where he had slept on it. “What’s wrong, Thoka?” he asked.

“Look at this!” Thoka pointed at the bump and showed him the finger that she had used to touch it. The finger was covered in a thin layer of clear goo. “They have now touched our child!” Her eyes began welling up with tears.

“AAAhhh!” Kpleeb yelled at the top of his lungs and launched his fists into the air. “You- gods! You damned gods!” He thrashed his shoulders violently and shook with a tremendous wrath. For a moment as he breathed in to scream again he heard Thoka’s sobbing and caught himself. Ashamed, he turned and rushed to her side. He enfolded her in his arms and quietly held her.

“I’m sorry for my outburst,” he murmured into her hair. He unballed his fists slowly before gently caressing the skin on her back. “These… cursed gods. Is nothing safe from them?” He shrugged and fell silent. Her hair smells fresh.

“What can we possibly do?” Thoka muttered bitterly as her sobs subsided. “They come in the night. We can’t see them. We can’t face them. We can’t see the sky or feel the rain. The sun is false!” She slumped against Kpleeb’s body and became silent.

What can I do to protect Thoka and our child? Kpleeb felt the need to plead with the cave or the sky which he could not see. Underneath his desperation a thick channel of anger simmered and scalded at the edges of his consciousness.

Thoka and I have become slaves. We are just toys for the gods to play with.

Thoka slowly walked to the food outcropping and drank. “This water is not cold enough,” she snapped at the cave. “Can’t you be bothered to at least provide decent water to us?” Expecting and receiving no response, she returned to the sleeping hollow and laid down.

Kpleeb watched her lay down. I should probably leave her alone. He walked through the gap into the other cave that was now the work-cave. He stood in the center and looked around him. The food outcropping was there and a long, thick rod he had been building leaned up against it. There were several pock-marks and a few holes in the walls from when he had dug to find the sub-structure. On the far wall was the defecation pit and another few paces from that rested his rotational device with its wedge-tip resting near the exposed gray-stone wall.

All that I’ve done to learn. All that I’ve done to escape this pit of the damned. Nothing has made any difference. What is the point?

“Cave, close the gap.”

As the gap was enclosed in a layer of the yellowish stone, Kpleeb picked up the long rod and felt its heft in his hand. He swung it in an arc as the fires of his fury peaked and raged inside him. The rod smashed into the upper edge of his rotational device where one of the bracing arms protruded from the base. The brace cracked and the rod snapped in half.

Kpleeb flinched as he was showered with shards of stone. Some of them peppered his face and torso.

He pointed with his knuckle at the floor next to him. “Cave! Give me a rod as thick as my arm and as tall as my body!”

Kpleeb flung the end of the broken rod at his device and impatiently turned to watch while the new rod grew. In a few seconds he grasped the top end and kicked the bottom end free from the floor. He began to swing the rod over and over. It crushed the braces, the swing arm that held the rotating rod, and the levers. When he was done, Kpleeb stood panting over a small pile of rubble. His arms burned from the unusual effort, and he felt better.

He kicked one of the chunks of stone and then turned to leave.

“Cave, open the gap”

He took a quick drink while the wall transformed and then stretched and walked through. Thoka was hunched over her small table and her shoulders and upper-arms were moving slightly. Kpleeb walked and knelt behind her.

“Are you okay?”

Thoka nodded. “I’m fine, just – frustrated. I feel helpless.” She twisted and looked up at Kpleeb. “What happened?” She touched his face, and her finger came away red.. “Where did this blood come from?”

His eyes slid to her hand and then back to her face. He shrugged sheepishly. “Urh… well I got mad.”

“You, mad?” Thoka smiled.

“You should see the other guy,” said Kpleeb with a relieved smile. “Urh, but I did sort of trash my rotational device.”

“Kpleeb! you put so much time into it. Did you at least save my rods?”

“No, I– I didn’t think about it.” His face fell. “I’m sorry.”

“Well, I can make others.” She reached to pat him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry about this. We have each other and we are smart enough to find a solution.”

Kpleeb shook his head. “Do you really believe that?”

“Do I want them touching us or our child? No way! But we can’t stop that. We also shouldn’t stop trying to live our lives. We are smarter now, and it would be poetic to turn that against them.”

Kpleeb nodded slowly. “I feel a bit ashamed for my anger. I’m not trying to give up you know… it’s just— I feel trapped. This is entirely unjust.”

“It is, and we should fight it. But we are trapped and enslaved. Let that be fuel for our fires.” Thoka smiled at Kpleeb. “Your passion is good. Keep it and use it. Unless they wipe our memory, we will fight back and make them regret this.”

Kpleeb nodded thoughtfully. “Thank you for reminding me. I know that I am the only caveman here, and your choices are limited, but you are truly the queen of the cavemen, and I love you.” He stood.

“I could not hope for a better mate, Kpleeb. Be strong, and be yourself.” Thoka adjusted the stone bracelet on her ankle. “We will escape, I just don’t know how yet.”